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I Stay, I Go


31st January 2002

8:45am: Rehearsal tonight..
Well, I just got word that Nankama will gather tonight. I'm a little surprised since we have no gigs lined up but I'm pleased also. It'll be nice not having any pressure on, maybe we can fool around with some new rhythms and breathe new life into the band.

I was urging our leader to think about doing a major clean up within the band. We've got a couple of slouchers who don't listen to this stuff, work on it, take it into their marrow, none of that. And that's SAD to me. And they're holding us back and def. preventing HIM from SHINING like CRAZY as he was meant to! I advised him to dis-band with the excuse that he 'had no time' now and then regroup in a mos. or so w/some new members.

Shame On Me!!!

What profoundly awful advise! I just didn't feel like he'd do it the honest way and was trying to help him out with excuses. Truthfully, I think we should ALL just sit down together and put the issues out on the table. The good, the bad - all of it. And ask for a higher level of commitment for those who DO want to take it up a notch without endlessly being drug back down.

This music is s'posed to be JOYOUS!!

I want to wrap myself in THAT.

Ah well....that's what's on my mind this morn...
5:07pm: All we are is a bundle of habitual patterns.

There's absolutely nothing behind that.

Pure, vast emptiness...
Current Mood: contemplative
5:27pm: The Space Between
This is my new favorite song.

This guy sings it so passionately too.

The 1st 20 or so times that I heard it, I cried.

I cried co's I'm certain that really IS where we are.

And it was so moving to me that someone else knew too.

And it was a glorious crying, a sorrowful joy.

And there's sadness in that yearning but also great, GREAT beauty...(where all beauty lives, in the sadness & yearning)

You have to really let go into it and sing it too and growl when he growls and let his passion pound down into you deep til you're just Primal

and unself-conscious

...and free


Dave Matthews Band - The Space Between


You cannot quit me so quickly
There's no hope in you for me
No corner y'could squeeze me
But I got all the time for you, love

The Space Between
The tears we cry
Is the laughter keeps us
coming back for more

The Space Between
The wicked lies we tell
And hope to keep us safe from the pain

But will I hold you again?
These fickle, fuddled words confuse me
Like 'Will it rain today?'
Waste the hours with talking, talking
These twisted game we play

We're strange allies
With warring hearts
What a wild-eyed beast you be
The Space Between
The wicked lies we tell
And hope to keep us safe from the pain

Will I hold you again?
Will I hold...

Look at us spinning out in
The madness of a roller coaster
You know you went off like a devil
In a church in the middle of a crowded room
All we can do, my love
Is hope we don't take this ship down

The Space Between
Where you're smiling high
Is where you'll find me if I get to go
The Space Between
The bullets in our firefight
Is where I'll be hiding, waiting for you

The rain that falls
Splash in your heart
Ran like sadness down the
window into...

The Space Between
Our wicked lies
Is where we hope to keep safe from pain

Take my hand
'Cause we're walking out of here
Oh, right out of here
Love is all we need here

The Space Between
What's wrong and right
Is where you'll find me hiding,
waiting for you

The Space Between
Your heart and mine
Is the space we'll fill with time

The Space Between...

(Plus I think of Woody when I hear it - why?)
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